Next Chapter Best Chapter Road Trip: Day 30 – What I wish 18-year-old Susie knew

I’ve been “on the road” in my Next Chapter Best, Chapter road trip for 30 days! For those of you who are new to this blog, I am a recently divorced empty-nester and on March 5, 2022, I loaded up my car and my dog and started a 4-month journey. I will be touring the United States and visiting family and friends. I will be crossing off my bucket list 5 of the 6 US states I have never visited. And even more importantly, I am going on an adventure of self-discovery. My own little Eat, Pray, Love journey.

If you have been following along, you know my first 3 weeks were a whirlwind of driving, visiting, hiking, working, touristing (I made that word up!). These last 10 days have been a much-needed time of rest and routine. I have spent the last 16 days at my older brother’s home, where he has graciously allowed my youngest daughter to live while she is in graduate school and working. He and his family do not live here full time, so it has just been me and Zia here. He has a beautiful home, in a beautiful city. We did some fun things like visiting Joshua Tree, Ocean Beach dog beach, the Flower Fields in Carlsbad, and the tide pools at Point Loma. We dressed up and went to a candlelight tribute to Taylor Swift by a string quartet. We have had great meals and enjoyed the amazing views San Diego offers. But what I have loved the most is spending time with my daughter on just “regular” days. It’s so fun to just “be” with your grown children when it’s not a holiday or event, and you get to see them in their normal day-to-day activities. We both worked full-time during my stay, and she has also gone to class. I have been able to experience her life alongside her. I met many of her closest friends, and it gave me comfort knowing that she has people looking out for her in this new life she is building across the country. I also had some quality alone time with myself. I am working on loving my own company, and so far, I haven’t annoyed myself too much yet!

Today, Mowgli and I will be leaving San Diego and heading up to visit with my younger brother, his wife, and their three kids. They also live in a beautiful home, in a beautiful city, with amazing views. I am looking forward to walking Mowgli with an ocean view every morning. But, again, what I am most excited about is getting to know my brother, sister-in-law, and their 3 kiddos on a deeper level. I left for college out of state when my brother was in second grade, and we have never lived in the same state since then. The times we have been together since then have been holidays and busy times where it’s hard to get to know people. So, I’m pumped to help with morning routines, be at their house when the kids get home from school, and hopefully just blend into their lives for the next 12 days. Yep – they are saints for letting me be a guest that long!

Now, on to the little series I am calling:

What would 56-year-old Susan tell “then” Susan?

Chapter 2: What would 56-year-old Susan tell 18-year-old Susie?

NOTE: If you didn’t read about 13-year-old Susie, you may want to jump back to the previous post.

NOTE AGAIN: I am not one to live in regret, and I do understand that every part of my previous life has led me to this part of my life. Let me be clear, I don’t wish for my past to be erased or changed. This is “therapy” for me as I look back on the pivotal moments of my life and try to learn from and lean into my past experiences as I move into my new chapter.

1984 – Let me set the stage for you.
Eighteen-year-old me could not wait to leave Nebraska. My whole high school career was based on that one objective – going to college in a different state. I did apply to the University of Nebraska, for college, but that was my backup, to the backup, to the backup school. It wasn’t that I thought I was too good for Nebraska, I just wanted new adventures. I wanted to meet new people, and do new things. I was raised by parents who left home and moved to new, faraway places. And that is how I was raised. It was expected that we would leave home and go far, far away…and don’t forget to take your lunch. See you at Christmas break.

With those things in mind, here are a few things 56-year-old me would tell 18-year-old Susie:

The next 5 years are going to be full of decision-making. You are good at making fast decisions and making them work. But, there is nothing wrong with taking time when thinking about big decisions. Not all decisions need to be made quickly.

Adventure is good. Running is not good. You will not be a new person just because you move to a new place.

Slow down. You don’t have to always be achieving or checking things off your to-do list.

What do you want? Think about that. Don’t think about what you think other people want. Don’t think about what you “should” do.

Boys are great. Girlfriends are better. Stay in touch with your friends, and don’t let life get in the way. You will have FOMO when you are 50 years old and see your college friends getting together and you aren’t part of that.

The Freshman 15 is legit. But it’s ok. You will lose it. Drink the beer, and eat the pizza. It’s all part of the experience.

What advice would you give your 18-year-old self?

If you don’t already, follow me on Instagram and Facebook. I am posting daily on my stories of all my adventures! Here are a few highlights from the last 10 days!